and so it is

So I've been tagged. Twice.

The first one's from Truds. The jist of this is to basically randomly select 5 occupations to complete the sentence:

If I could be a scientist
If I could be a farmer
If I could be a musician
If I could be a doctor
If I could be a painter
If I could be a gardener
If I could be a missionary
If I could be a chef
If I could be an architect
If I could be a linguist
If I could be a psychologist
If I could be a librarian
If I could be an athlete
If I could be a lawyer
If I could be an inn keeper
If I could be a professor
If I could be a writer
If I could be a llama rider
If I could be a bonnie pirate
If I could be a service member
If I could be a photographer
If I could be a philantrophist
If I could be a rap artist
If I could be a child actor
If I could be a secret agent
If I could be a comedian
If I could be a priest
If I could be a radio announcer
If I could be a phlebotomist
If I could be Paris Hilton's stylist
If I could be a movie producer
If I could be the CEO of Microsoft
If I could be an astronout
If I could be a world famous blogger
If I could be married to a current famous political leader
If I could be a dog trainer

If I could be a llama rider, I'd start saving up to get a camel for economic reasons including that of lower water consumption.

If I could be a phlebotomist, I'd be weary of explaining what my job is based upon.

If I could be a priest, Pope Benedict wouldn't be very happy.

If I could be an artist, I'd never paint abstract to call it art.

If I could be a child actor, I'd tell Lindsay I can take it from here and whack the shit out of Hilary. When I'm done, she'll be the packaging of nasi lemak (cos it's like old news!).

I'm only gonna tag Yokie for tagging me. Oh, oh smell that Yokie? Smell it? Smell it? It's the smell of revenge, muahahaha!


The next one's from surprise, surprise, Yokie. I think it's pretty self explanatory.
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Claudia
2. Clauds
3. Hippo (I eat, sleep and stink)
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. Little Miss Scribbles
2. Clauds
3. nutballeegoofster (claudee, claudster and clauds were taken on yahoo!, so...)
THREE THINGS THAT YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. I'm fat! Wahaha!
2. I'm quite the self involved
3. I can't piss standing up
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. Bunions (bleh), courtesy of my grandfather.
2. True to my culture, my Indian side dies off when I smile to reveal chinky eyes.
3. I've got my dad's body - Broad shoulders and a small ass. My panties are size XS for crying out loud!
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Judy telling ghost stories (make it stop!)
2. Japanese and Koreans (not Judy though; she's cute). A Tale of Two Sisters and The Ring have scarred me for life!
3. Denting Sunshine
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Water!
2. Lipbalm!
3. Anthony!
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. A Timex
2. A blue band from Mother
3. A pair of black chandelier earrings
THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS:
1. Michael Jackson because he's innocent
2. Damien Rice because he got dumped by Renee Zellweger
3. Ethan Lim because he sings "Guilty" at Redbox
THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE SONGS:
1. Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap
2. The SpongeBob Square Pants Theme Song
3. A Simple Kind of Life by No Doubt
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. Playfulness
2. Mutual trust
3. Different opinions/beliefs to keep it interesting
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. Eyes
2. Lips
3. And apparently skinny-ness - all the guys I've thought to be hot are thin.
THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBIES:
1. Playing tennis
2. Watching The OC
3. Reading The Thorn Birds while on the throne
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Drive to McDonalds to get myself a cuppa orange juice. I'm lovin' it.
2. Look for The Thorn Birds - nature's calling.
3. Blow my nose
THREE PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO TAKE THIS SURVEY NOW:
1. Trudy
2. Rochelle
3. Javier's girlfriend